Welcome to the farmer's market

We're in a train club

Do you have an interest in being part of a train club

Can you spare a few minutes for me to tell you about trains and my train club

In my train club we travel exclusively on the ground

We love the clickety clack

Of the railroad track

And we don't believe the world is round

We've all worried about being on a train falling off the end of the earth

Though getting derailed

Makes us really scared

We think the lack of oxygen is objectively worse

Something that's comforting to us is the chances of this are mini

We've not heard of attacks

Using secret tracks

That drop people into dark infinity

There are bad cooks who will make you bad food

There are bad therapists who try to ruin your mood

There are really awful people in every profession

So there are probably bad engineers who'll take your train in bad directions

Oh, most companies don't have safety plans in place for this danger

Because they believe the words of strangers

Who say the world is an irregularly shaped ellipsoid

This is the kind of thinking I try to avoid

There's another train club located near me

Known for free hands-on demonstrations

And railway nails that come from exotic locations

Ours mostly exists to promote flat earth train track theories

Our members don't feel safety in cars boats or planes

Planes plummet down to the ground, boats sink

Cars crash into each other when their drivers drink

There's a sense of comfort when riding on trains

One think I recommend when on rolling stock

Is travel exclusively mid planet

Don't travel near the parts where the land ends

Or you could be in for a sudden drop

There are bad cooks who will make you bad food

There are bad therapists who try to ruin your mood

There are really awful people in every profession

So there are probably bad engineers who'll take your train in bad directions

But most companies don't have safety plans in place for this danger

Because they believe the words of strangers

Who say the world is an irregularly shaped ellipsoid

This is the kind of thinking I try to avoid

Picture a train set in your mind

And you're probably picturing it on a table

That keeps the train high up off the floor

As much as it's able

In the image you're holding in your mind

You're picturing the track as round

A perpetual loop the train's placed on

That keeps the model from falling down

Well, that's how the earth is in real life

It's a flat strip floating in space

And real train tracks circle around everywhere

Keeping everything in its place

There are bad cooks who will make you bad food

There are bad therapists who try to ruin your mood

There are really awful people in every profession

So there are probably bad engineers who'll take your train in bad directions

But most companies don't have safety plans in place for this danger

Because they believe the words of strangers

Who say the world is an irregularly shaped ellipsoid

This is the kind of thinking I try to avoid

This is the kind of thinking I try to avoid

This is the kind of thinking I try to avoid

This is the kind of thinking I try to avoid

So, have I managed to convince you to sign up

No, I'm not joking about the flat earth thing

Yes, there is another train club nearby that doesn't focus on the shape of the earth

Ok, you have a good day too, ma'am