Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found
We've got mountains of content
If none of it's of interest to you, you'd be the first
Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet?
Just nod or shake your head and we'll do the rest
Would you like to fight for civil rights or tweet a racial slur?
We got a million different ways to engage
Here's a tip for straining pasta
Here's a nine-year-old who died
We got movies, and doctors, and fantasy sports
And a bunch of colored pencil drawings
Of all the different characters in Harry Potter fucking each other
'Cause a random guy just kindly sent you photos of his cock
They are grainy and off-putting
Don't act surprised, you know you like it, you whore
Get offended, see a shrink
Show us pictures of your children
Tell us every thought you think
Start a rumor, buy a broom
Or send a death threat to a boomer
Or DM a girl and groom her
Do a Zoom or find a tumor in your
Here's a healthy breakfast option
Here's why women never fuck you
Here's how you can build a bomb
Which Power Ranger are you?
Obama sent the immigrants to vaccinate your kids
Could I interest you in everything?
A little bit of everything
Could I interest you in everything?
A little bit of everything
You know, it wasn't always like this
Right before the towers fell, circa '99
We set our sights and spent our nights
For you, you, insatiable you
Mommy let you use her iPad
And it did all the things
To put the world in your hand
Could I interest you in everything?
Could I interest you in everything?
A little bit of everything
And anything and everything
And anything and everything